Friday, September 20, 2013

A Letter to My Mother

I wanted to acknowledge this day, the tenth anniversary of my mother's passing, but I wasn't quite sure how. So I thought this year I'd share a letter written to my mother, and hope that maybe somewhere out there she's reading it too. This is a personal note, something I don't normally do here, so bare with me.  

Books can be very personal for me, especially the stories that feel as though they've been written with my life experiences in mind.  Those who seek literature, or simply discover it unknowingly, in the same way can understand that.  These are my thoughts, my feelings, my words... of my story... ten years later.

Dear Mom,

       I can still remember the phone call that woke us in the middle of the night, the one that would forever change my days & nights forward.  You fought so effortlessly during those few weeks of so much uncertainty, but really all we wanted was for you to be comfortable.  At least, that's what I would whisper to you as I sat by your bed side and wondered what would come next.  You raised me to be a strong woman, and in those final moments I truly learned what strength meant.  But it was something I wouldn't fully grasp until years later, and still find myself reaching out for, even now.

The reality of my world is that you are gone and I am still here.  Even ten years later it's a reality I want no business being a part of, but unfortunately we don't always get to choose our realities.  They are handed to us, sometimes shoved in our faces, and we must make do with what we have. 

Some days are hard, really hard.  I want you, my mother, for so many reasons.  I want to be selfish and cry because you're not here.  It's just not fair.  But then I wipe away the tears and remind myself of the twenty-two years I did have you here.  Sure we took them for granted, I think that's the human thing to do.  But we lived our lives.  And that's what makes those twenty-two years such special years for me.

You drove me to dance practice, spent hours at the sewing machine creating a one of a kind masterpiece that later I'd learn to appreciate and treasure. Mom, you always had a warm plate of food on the table, even after a long shift at work, and yet somehow you even found the time to sit and listen as I talked about my day, never giving away just how tired you really were.  We lived our lives, as mother and daughter, through the ups and all the crazy downs.  We simply lived, and for that I am forever grateful. 

It's been ten years since I last touched your hand, kissed your cheek, and said those final words of "I'll see you soon".  Ten years of not having my mother around for anything and everything, but I've lived.

I've survived. I've kept going. 

And that is something you taught me, something that will forever be instilled in me.

To simply just live.


  1. you have me wiping big fat tears here. you are a strong and beautiful women. i see so much of you in your mother in that picture. i'm gonna go and give my mum a big hug now. thank you for sharing ginger <3

  2. I just lost a friend aged 22, it is hard for me but your article somehow made me feel better.
    Thank you, this is a very beautiful letter. Your mom really seemed incredible, I hope she can read your words today.

  3. Ginger, thank you so much for sharing this. This is easily one of the most beautiful and touching posts I've ever read on your blog or any other. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it must have been to lose your mother at such a relatively young age or continue to cope and to live with as much grade and courage as you have. Your mother sounds like a strong, admirable woman, and I'm sure she's looking down on you and is proud of the daughter she raised.

    In writing this post, you've given us a gift. To remember to cherish those in our lives. To slow down, stop, and simply be thankful for even the most infinitesimal of moments together. I know that I'll be giving my parents a kiss on the cheek today and thanking them for all they've done, but please know that you have inspired that. You're an inspiration, both to those who have already been through, or have yet to experience, what you were forced to face as a young girl. Thank you for being you.

    My thoughts will be with both you and your mother today *Hugs* <3

  4. <3333 Beautiful letter, lady. I love you. *hugs* This day is always so hard. I always thought it would get easier? But it doesn't at all. Your mom would be SOOOO proud of the woman you have become. I would give anything to have my mom back but I will say I feel blessed, through our mutual loss, that we could have bonded over something that has impacted our lives in ways most things can't. Sharing our losses with each other has encouraged me and made me feel closer to you. I KNOW you always will understand.

    You know where to find me if you are feeling down today <3

  5. That is a beautiful letter written by a beautiful person. I admire your strength and know it must have been difficult to write. Your Mom sounds like an amazing woman and I know she'd be proud of who you have become. I think this is an important message for everyone-- we never know how life is going to go and need treasure all of these moments. Sending lots of love your way today..... <3 (((hugs)))

  6. There's no doubt in my mind that your mom was an incredible lady, because I see that quality in you, Ginger, and in the way you and your sisters love and support one another. I see it in the way you love your nephews and are MOST DEF the coolest aunt they'll have. (Sorry Ginger's sisters! But she is! :)) And this letter and its eloquence is beautiful. It's a beautiful way to honor her on this day. Lots of love and hugs your way. :)

  7. Aaaaaaand crying. *hugs to you* Your mom sounds like an incredible person and I'm sure she would be so proud of how you have been strong.

    I'm visiting my family this weekend and the first thing I'm going to do is hug my mama. God bless you, Ginger.

  8. I love that picture and this letter. I have a feeling your mom is looking down and sharing in all the best parts of your life since then, and giving you strength during the tougher ones.

    Sending you hugs and all kinds of love today. xo

  9. Wonderful letter! I'm touched.., I remember my grandma. :'(

  10. There is no doubt your mom is *so* unbelievably proud of the woman you are today. Sending love and hugs your way today and every day xoxo.

  11. This is incredibly touching. Your mother would be so proud of you. Thanks for sharing.

  12. This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with us. Reminds us to appreciate everyday with those we love. Thank you.

  13. {{hugs}} That was a beautiful letter to your mom and I have no doubt that she is incredibly proud of the strong, beautiful, independent woman you've become! She may not be able to love you in the same way as before, but I truly believe she's loving you from afar!

    Thank you for sharing such a personal story with us!

    Love ya!
    Isalys / Book Soulmates

  14. What a beautiful, touching letter and also inspiring. You sound like a very strong woman your mother can be proud of :) Thank you for sharing this *hug*

  15. This is SO beautiful! I'm sure that your mom is smiling down upon you, proud of the woman you've become. XOXO

  16. Oh Ginger. Your mom was surely a wonderful woman to have co-created such an AMAZING daughter such as you! You're beautiful and strong and so darn eloquent. I love you tons! Thank you for sharing this beautiful piece of yourself with us.

  17. This is beautiful! You are so courageous to share this with your readers. There's no doubt you've touched others and I'm sure you've been an encouragement to those you've experienced similar losses. Thank you for your courage.

  18. This is beautiful! You are so courageous to share this with your readers. There's no doubt you've touched others and I'm sure you've been an encouragement to those you've experienced similar losses. Thank you for your courage.


Hello Readers! Once you've typed up that comment that I oh so appreciate, please click "notify me" in the bottom right corner so that you don't miss my reply! Thanks, xo.

Site Design by Designer Blogs